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Keep Climbing, Girl (What ancient cathedrals remind us about the grief...
A Coping With Grief Post Durham Cathedral, England When I was in Durham last week, the Durham Cathedral, a UNESCO World Heritage Site, was at the top of my “must-see” list. Of all the European...
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Widows and Wildflowers
“There is poetry among the wildflowers.” Rachel Irene Stevenson A Keeping It Real Post When I was in Bristol a few weeks ago, I had the opportunity to see Calendar Girls on stage at the Hippodrome. A...
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Invisibility: The Hidden Side Effect of Widowhood
“All the being and the doing, expansive, glittering, vocal, evaporated; and one shrunk, with a sense of solemnity, to being oneself, a wedge-shaped core of darkness, something invisible to others.”...
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My first novel, Heart of a Kingdom
I am celebrating the release of my first novel in Belfast, Ireland, where I wrote it. Notice something a little different? Welcome to the new and improved TheRealLisaBain.com. Why the change? I’m...
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Letting Go Of Grief Rituals
“Ritual is able to hold the long-discarded shards of our stories and make them whole again. It has the strength and elasticity to contain what we cannot contain on our own, what we cannot face in...
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Suicide and the Bereaved
“To write poetry and to commit suicide, apparently so contradictory, had really been the same, attempts at escape.” John Fowles, The Magus A Keeping It Real Post My all-time favorite photo, from the...
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What Hermione Granger’s Undetectable Extension Charm Reminds Us About Love...
“You are protected, in short, by your ability to love.” – Albus Dumbledore J.K. Rowling A Keeping It Real Post p/c pixabay Last’s week’s post was a bit heavy. Thanks for all the comments and private...
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What Yoga Teaches Us About Holding Space for Grief
“Feelings come and go like clouds in a windy sky. Conscious breathing is my anchor.” Thich Nhat Hanh, Stepping into Freedom: Rules of Monastic Practice for Novices A Coping With Grief Post When I was...
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My favorite authors
“What really knocks me out is a book that, when you’re all done reading it, you wish the author that wrote it was a terrific friend of yours and you could call him up on the phone whenever you felt...
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Funerals, Gratitude, and the End of A Journey
A Keeping It Real Post This is the little chapel in Durham Cathedral, England. This week I attended my first funeral since D’s. For those of you keeping track, it’s been over three years. I don’t...
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Another Birthday Post
“Age is irrelevant. Ask me how many sunsets I’ve seen, hearts I’ve loved, trips I’ve taken, or concerts I’ve been to. That’s how old I am.” ~Joelle A Keeping It Real Post Remember when I wrote about...
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Say Their Names
A Friends and Family Post Thursday is American Thanksgiving and the kickoff to the holiday season. It’s also a time that has the potential to be extra painful to the bereaved. I’ve written a bunch on...
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Bros, Lows, and Fatherless Widows
This post is dedicated to my Bros on both sides of the pond. You know who you are. I wouldn’t dream of doing this life without you. XO, L A Coping With Grief Post November marked the fourth...
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Winter, Shadow Work, and Grief
“Melancholy were the sounds on a winter’s night.” Virginia Woolf, Jacob’s Room A Coping With Grief Post Winter is the season when nature rests. Bears and other creatures hide away in dark places to...
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A Letter To Myself on New Year’s Eve 2019
For all of the trouble you’ve been through The blessings doubled just for you, the best is yet to come Today is the first day of the best days of your life You ain’t seen nothing yet. Frank Sinatra,...
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Widowhood Stole My Identity. I’m Throwing Off the Shackles and Taking It Back.
“I belong to the people I love, and they belong to me. They, and the love and loyalty I give them, form my identity far more than any word or group ever could.” Veronica Roth, Allegiant A Keeping It...
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When Love was Complicated, the Grief is Too
A Keeping It Real Post In the last 48 hours, the world’s reaction to the news of Kobe Bryant’s tragic death has gone from shock to sadness to anger. Many rape survivors are understandably angry at the...
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What It Means To Hold Space for the Bereaved
“Sometimes, I wonder if we ever truly let anyone completely in. The desire for another human being to know you, all of you, all the pieces, even the ones you’re ashamed of — is huge. But too often, we...
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Holding Space For The Bereaved, Part 2 (Widow to Widow)
A Keeping It Real Post Last week I wrote about what it meant for friends and family to hold space for the newly bereaved. Thank you for all the comments, private messages, and emails regarding this...
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Social Distancing and Widowhood (Do The Right Thing)
A Keeping It Real Post Took this photo in Killarney, Ireland. Y’all know I’m a bit of a travel addict. Social distancing has given me cabin fever, but I’ve chosen to help flatten the curve, and all my...
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